Writings of a Beholder 🌿 8.25.23
Looking for miracles
Photo by Geordanna Cordero on Unsplash
Looking for Miracles
Last September, I started collecting pieces of art.
At first, I wanted to begin collecting artwork from the different places that I traveled to as a memento — an artwork of memories, if you will. I planned to slowly fill the wall in our entryway with them, collecting pieces of art like I was collecting all of the places that I had been.
However, I soon realized that limiting this collection of art to my traveling was going to be a problem, because what began as a way to remember and honor my travels soon turned into an insatiable pursuit of beauty and wonder.
Until last September, I had never given much thought to artwork; creating it or admiring it, let alone collecting it. Then I walked into an art gallery while visiting Saugatuck, Michigan last September and fell in love with an old art print of sailboats floating in a marina. To the naked eye, there was nothing special about it. The colors were muted, the paper was aged and yellowing, and even a bit stained in one corner.
But it spoke to me because I love sailboats and old things and I knew I had to take it home with me. So I did, and it now hangs on my wall in the entryway, framed and still aging, reminding me of that weekend away.
Reminding me of the longing it uncovered within — the deep longing for beauty.
Now, everywhere I go, I look for artwork that speaks beauty and light to my soul. Pieces that speak wonder and awe and of old things maybe long forgotten. I collect them, even if they’re not far from home, and I hang them up or prop them up in frames and let their wonder pour into me.
It’s funny, what I’ve noticed happening to me the more I pay attention to the beauty of a painting, a drawing, or a print. The more I look for beauty to collect in my home, the more open my eyes have become to the colors of my everyday life that are normally muted by my inattentiveness.
I’m learning that searching for beauty is rebellious.
It’s an attempt to clap back the darkness and awaken wonder as a practice and I can safely say that it’s worked.
The art, I mean, has worked its way right into me, leaving awe and breathlessness in its wake. This practice of collecting art is really a practice of noticing and receiving beauty — beauty that revives a weary mind and soothes a tired heart. Beauty that reminds me that Light is always pouring in, even when my lenses go a bit dark.
So when I see art that makes wonder come alive in me, I don’t hesitate to give it a home and a beholder. And the more I wonder at this art, the more attentive I become in naming the colors in a sunrise all peachy-pink and golden hues. The more I notice the way my body relaxes when I’m putting together a fresh bouquet of supermarket flowers. The more I feel the sacredness of conversation with friends and how the beauty of our humanity and vulnerability intricately connects us.
This collecting of art has turned into a practice of pursuing beauty and letting the Creator of all things beautiful and good and wonder-full pursue me. Letting my eyes be opened to His with-ness in all things.
I no longer just collect art from my travels, I collect pieces of wonder when they speak to me. This happened just a few weeks ago when writer, Kristin Vanderlip, opened up her online art shop of mini oil pastel paintings. One, in particular, caught my eye — a painting of a twilight, candyfloss sky all pink and purple and cream with a hint of darkest blue.
The title of it was ‘Looking for Miracles’ and that’s when I knew right then that it was mine.
Because that’s what beholding beauty in art is, really — a practice of looking for miracles. It’s looking for Light despite the dark, hope despite the sorrow, and joy despite the ache of loss and the deepening longing for more than this present world.
I’m convinced that searching for beauty puts us face to face with God Himself — Beauty Himself. Maybe this searching for beauty and letting wonder fill us is really us crossing paths with our Maker right in the middle of all that’s muted and mundane.
Perhaps our longing for beauty is really a longing for our Lord.
“I have asked one thing from the Lord;
it is what I desire:
to dwell in the house of the Lord
all the days of my life,
gazing on the beauty of the Lord
and seeking him in his temple.” (Psalm 27:4, CSB, emphasis added)
What if gazing on the beauty of the Lord could start right here, right now, at this very moment?
Look up from the page… what do you see?
That’s where it starts, right in front of us.
I wanted to collect art from my travels but what I learned is that beauty is everywhere, even in my home, my neighborhood, and just a few steps down the sidewalk. It’s in the smile of a stranger, the way the leaves in our backyard tree sway gently in a summer’s breeze, in the color of my green t-shirt, in the hues of creamy pink in my neighbor’s hydrangea bush, and even in the messy aftermath of a home-cooked meal.
The mundane can be beautiful, too, if we pay attention, leaning in to listen to the whispers of heaven leaking right on through.
I’m choosing to behold beauty and suddenly wonder cracks me right open, and tears of joy mingled with grief cleanse the hurt. This is what this practice of collecting art is doing to me.
This is how wonder is forming me.
This is where I’m finding grace and where the miracles are finding me.
With you on the journey,
Celia
Life Lately
A Breath Prayer for Your Weekend
breathe in:
By His breath.
breathe out:
The heavens gained their beauty. (Job 26:13)
*If you’d like to learn more about the practice of breath prayer, download this complete digital guide to practicing breath prayer.
Resources & Good Things to Pick Up
All of Kristin Vanderlip’s oil pastels have sold since her latest drop, but check out her online art shop and sign up for her email list because I know she will be dropping more again soon and you’ll want to be the first to know: Kristin Vanderlip Art
My friend introduced me to this spontaneous worship song by Bethel Music. I’ve been playing it this week softly in the background while I journal and pray: Colors by Bethel Music
This week, I added a new journal to my Etsy shop, The Beholding Co., and it’s my favorite one yet! It says ‘behold’ on the cover and it would be perfect for reflecting on your own beholding moments with God or for any of your written thoughts and prayers: Beholding Journal
Grab some breath prayer cards, a journal, a candle, and other contemplative resources from my Etsy shop: The Beholding Co.
Grab a copy of my Bible study, You Are Beloved: a 21-day study on how to root your identity in the love of God, over on Amazon. And if you’d like a free 3-day sample of the study, reply to this email and I’ll send it right over!
My friend and licensed spiritual director, Kari Bartkus, offers an 8-week journaling program for those who want to process their grief and trauma with God within the safety of blank journal pages. I’ve completed the program myself and can say confidently that it was incredibly impactful and healing: Journal Gently
An Invitation to Pause & Reflect
A regular practice of reflection helps us recognize what’s going on beneath the surface of our souls so we can name it in the Lord’s presence. Because as we learn to name what we feel, what we need, and what we long for, we’re also learning to discern the Spirit’s sweet, gentle voice within our hearts and lives.
Take a few moments today or this weekend to journal or contemplate with the Holy Spirit the following question(s) or prompt(s):
When you have time, grab a journal and a pen and write down descriptively what you see in front of you. Notice the different hues of color, the way the light touches your eyes, and the sounds and smells you sense. Once you’re finished describing the scene before you, reflect on the following:
What about this scene is beautiful to you?
Is there anything that makes you uncomfortable about it?
Where is God in what you’re beholding?
How might you cultivate a small practice of beauty in this season of your life?
